Sunday, January 13, 2008

Fuzz's Stew

There is a professional basketball team that plays in Minneapolis. They are called the Minnesota Timberwolves and the play in the Western Conference of the National Basketball Association. They are an actual pro team right here in Minnesota! I’m dead serious.

I thought I would remind all of you of the T-wolves because they are a forgotten franchise right now. They are like a forbidden fruit, a black sheep son, or a dark secret--- no one is talking about them. Maybe rightfully so since they just won their fifth game out of 36 the other night but still, this is a professional franchise! The problem is that they fucking suck...badly. The local newspapers cover them half-heartedly, attendance is in the gutter, fans are wearing paper bags over their heads and the water cooler talk is all but gone. And when you do hear shop talk it’s usually about how bad they are and laced with curses. Like… man the T-wolves fucking blow and Mchale has his head so far up his fucking ass that I can’t stand watching these assholes anymore. If you aren’t getting the picture, it isn’t pretty right now at Target Center.

However, after all of that, I must admit that I’ve followed this team more closely than last year’s team. I still watch a good amount of games, or at least some quarters and definitely check box scores after every game. I’m still fairly plugged in to the squad. Why? I’ve got no flipping idea. I mean let’s be real, they are 5-31, on pace for one of the worst seasons in NBA history. Yet, I get a little excited when McCants has a 25-point night or Bassy drops 10 dimes but we lose by 15 in the same breath. Do I care? Not really. I’ve fully bought into the excuse that we’re young and re-building. Who gives a shit if Dallas comes to your court and blows your doors out? Oh well, we’re young this is expected is my response. Lately I’ve caught myself thinking a little differently about this whole we’re young-who cares attitude.

First off, we should be better than this. Five wins at this point in the season for an NBA team in this day of the NBA is too shitty. Teams are coming off back-to-backs all the time, half the games are played sleepwalking and frankly the league has some shitty teams that you should be able to beat teams at least on your home court. Minnesota’s five wins are too few. When they said they wanted to bottom out, they meant it. Saying this, I can get over the heavy losing if I was convinced this re-building is going to work.

I’m not---I was duped again.

I keep forgetting that I’m putting my faith in Mchale and Taylor who are two of the bigger laughing stocks in the NBA. Why should I have faith in Tweedle dum and Tweedly dee? They’ve messed up pretty much everything they’ve put their hands on with this franchise. The Joe Smith Saga, the non-attempt of surrounding KG with quality players (one year exception), bad contracts (Mark Madsen, Hassell, T-Hud), bad trades where they give up way too much along with draft picks (Jaric and Wally) and missed draft picks (Ndudi Ebi instead of Howard, McCants instead of Granger, & Foye instead of Roy etc...)

(*Note*- The Ebi pick is inexcusable. They blew that completely. Ebi is scoring eight points a game in Pakistan or something and Howard is a stud. I like McCants and think Foye is going to be a good player. But it looks like Granger was a better pick, as does Roy. Roy is an up & coming all-star in his second year only. It doesn’t mean we have chop liver in McCants and Foye but it would be nice to have a pick work out in our favor just once. Has that ever happened? The only one I can think of is the KG pick. Maybe this isn’t even 100% the front offices fault but every pick we’ve made a player close by our pick seems to work out better. Can’t we pick the absolute right guy? It’s so frustrating. )

I’m not sold. That’s the point. I like a few pieces of this team but I’m starting to think this bottoming out plan may never pan out. We might get to the playoffs in a few years but never make a serious run, like we are ought to do. We’ll be back right where we started before we let “The Big Ticket” go. I think I fell into the whole “let’s trade KG, get young guys, build up for the future and be dominant in 4-5 years.” At least that’s what they led us to believe when they traded away the franchise and I bought it.

But the question you need to ask yourself is why do you think this will for sure work out with this guy below running the show?

What the hell was I thinking?

Five T-Wolves Ingredients

Foye is cleared to play. I just read he’s not coming back for another two weeks because he needs to clear some practice tests first. Once he’s fully cleared to do everything, play him 40 minutes a night. He needs to catch up and he’s a big part of the future. Sit Euro-stinky-trash Jaric on the bench. He’ll be fine; he’s dating a Victoria Secret Model.

Shoddy McCants. Bring this guy up to a lady or fella that follows the T-Wolves and they will have an opinion. People either hate him or love him. For some reason people have strong thoughts about this guy. Maybe it’s still some lingering feelings when he compared his UNC college basketball experience to being in the slammer.

Or maybe it’s because he’s our second best player this year and people can’t handle that. Either way, I’m on the love side. Maybe he’s not the best 2nd option but I like him on this team. The haters want him off this team and to have someone to be brought in. I always ask…who? Give me a guy that is attainable that will come to Minnesota that is better than McCants. FYI: Lebron has been campaigning for a player for two years and he’s gotten no one. Who are these mystery good players that we can get?

To put it in print...I’m not a fan of Randy Wittman. I think he’s worthless. Witty’s career record as a head coach is 79-163 yet we gave him the reins to this re-building movement. I would have preferred a younger assistant type guy that the players could relate too more not an aging I’ve sucked my whole career coach.

It would be nice to see Big Gay Al Jefferson get to the All-star game. He has zero chance of getting voted in but I think he should be a coach’s choice. He’s averaging approximately 20 pts and 12 rebounds. That puts him 15th in the West for points and 4th in the West for rebounds. It would be nice for him to get some love.

Antoine Walker is averaging 20 minutes a game and Gerald Green is averaging 12 minutes a game. F-ing change that Witty! You are 5-31 dipshit get all the young guys in there. I don’t care if Green doesn’t know his head from his ass, Walker does nothing for our long term goal.


1 comment:

Finn-to-win said...


I have to agree with you on this stew. I would not even know Minnesota had a NBA team if I wasnt from MN. There is nothing at all said about them at all. It sucks being a MN fan and having to talk to people fom Boston. I get to a point where I get so pissed I have to walk away.

Witty is apart of the good ole boy club that Taylor Mcfale and Witty are apart of. Its just a joke and us fans have to really call for some change.