Monday, October 1, 2007

TKOT Chat: Vikings v. Packers


Note to our readers: because we were so hyped for the big Vikes-Pack showdown, we decided to do a running chat during the game. It covers the game, other NFL games, important baseball scores, and some President’s Cup (golf) action. Note that anything in bold, italicized writing is game action to try and keep you in the loop. Also, PDB is Dogg. It's his new nickname. If you want to know what it means, ask him. Finally, this is a REALLY long post--be warned.

Fuzz: Alright ladies and gents, we're here on this rainy Minneapolis day doing a running in game chat for the Viking/Packer game. It's the Packers and we hate them, so doing this is a must. Let's get this thing going baby! First things first, this Favre breaking record crap is so annoying. I hope he breaks the INT record first
Q: Love the throwbacks today
Minnesota goes deep on the second play of the game
Q
: And that was interference on the bomb to Sid the Kid
Q: Was that pass really to Jeff Dugan?????
Fuzz: Al Harris needs a haircut, he looks like "Cousin It"
Q: Chester's back, back again, Chester's back, tell a friend...
Fuzz: We're going to need him to spell rookie AP. He can't carry the whole load
Q: Very true, that's probably why he broke down so much in college
PDB: Why is Chester Taylor starting?
Q: Because he's the starter. You don't lose that because of an injury
PDB: You should when a rookie runs for over 100 two out of three weeks
Another deep pass, another incompletion
Q: Come on Kelly! Learn how to throw a deep ball
Fuzz: Have we completed a pass this year beyond 20 yards?
PDB: No
Q: Have we completed a pass over 10?
The Packers come out on offense for the first time in the game
Q
: Heads up folks, here comes Brett...the record is now officially in danger
PDB: The Miami/Oakland game is delayed right now because of thunder and lightning
Q: Dayne and Barber?
Fuzz: Who cares? Two terrible teams going at it
PDB: TD Joe Jurevicius
Fuzz: Derek Anderson just threw the first TD of the day for the Browns. Is their a bigger fantasy surprise?
Q: Our own crowd just caused an offsides on us
Q: Definitely more Packer Backers than Vikes fans in the Dome today
PDB: I'm going for the Pack
Interception by Darren Sharper on Favre’s first pass attempt
Q: YOU BET!!!!
Q: All day Sharper! Pretty sure I called that in the preview
Flag on the play…
Fuzz
: Hold up
Q: Screw that. Hocculi sucks.
Fuzz: Hocculi is borrowing my sisters shirt today, that's nice
Q: Extra Medium?
Q: Why would GB even attempt to run on us? Their running game sucks and we have the best run D ever
Fuzz: Ever?
Q: Um, sure? 60 yards a game last year...I'm no statistician, but that's pretty good
Fuzz: We're winning today I can feel it. We look hungry
PDB: This game is so boring though
Q: Mets/Marlins 0-0
PDB: What if a game gets cancelled and I have two guys playing in the game?
Fuzz: They'll make it up, they have to right?
Q: Ooh, great question. I would guess when they make up the game you'll get the stats
Q: That could mess up a few fantasy games
Adrian Peterson knifes through the GB D on consecutive plays
Fuzz: Peterson is a Hall of Fame lock
Q: AD for 8...obviously
PDB: That's why Chester should not be starting
Q: They both should be
A half pass, half sack as Holcomb looks very confused on the field
PDB: Lol, what was that?
Q: Weird, Holcomb gets sacked
Q: Wait, how was that a pass?
PDB: The start of this game is being delayed by lightning. The conditions at Dolphins Stadium are so bad, and the rain is coming down so hard, they have elected to put the tarp on the field, further delaying the start of today's contest.
Q: A tarp? Is this baseball?
Fuzz: It's raining here right now, so this raises a question. Does that new stadium need a roof?
PDB: That's what I'm saying
Q: For baseball? No. There are rain delays/cancellations all the time.
PDB: Get Chester in the slot or something
Another big run by AP
Fuzz: man crush couldn't be any higher for AP right now for me.
Holcomb is intercepted on another ill-advised deep pass…flag on the play
Q: Please be illegal contact...
Fuzz: Come on baby...
Q: YES
PDB: Worst QB's in the league
Fuzz: No question
Q: Wow, dodged a major bullet there
PDB: I would rather have our intramural QB, Alex Jadin, out there
Q: For sure
Fuzz: Or Shane Falco
PDB: Griese--Intentional Grounding
Minnesota gives the ball away on a fumble at midfield
Q: Remind me again why we are throwing the ball to Jeff Dugan? Nice fumble hank
PDB: 78 Yard TD Braylon Edwards
Fuzz: Great start by us Dogg with Lynch right now. -2 yards
Fuzz: Nice pickup with Pennington, Q. Derek Anderson, ever hear of him?
Q: Screw you. By the way, I love the internet: right now I have live scoring for all three of my fantasy leagues, this chat, and the Mets game all at my disposal.
Fuzz: How many more weeks do you give it for the defense to start fist fighting with the offense? They got to be pissed
Touchdown Green Bay. Favre on a 30 yard slant to Greg Jennings
Q
: Record...great
Fuzz: Oops, nevermind
Q: Favre just carried Jennings, fireman style, from the endzone to the sidelines. I hate him
Q: Are they really stopping the game for this?
Q: Booooooooooooooo
PDB: Dude, he's the best QB of all time
Q: Not true
Fuzz: Will they stop the game once he gets the INT record?
Q: That record was set 6 years ago
Fuzz: Dan Marino looks 32. He's aged nicely
Q: All make up and Isotoners
PDB: Honestly, I'm out....I can't watch this garbage any more, I would much rather be sleeping right now
Q: Why? False starts and incomplete passes make for great television
Fuzz: You are a tool
PDB: We are brutal
Q: 5-0 Marlins, bottom first
Fuzz: Santana will be a Met next year
Q: As long as we get Pelfrey and Milledge, that's fine with me
PDB: Get Maine
Fuzz: Holcomb might be better then T-Jack, thoughts?
Q: Equally terrible. Holcomb completes a few more passes, but loses those yards when he gets sacked twice a series.
PDB: They're both awful
Fuzz: Think Dan Marino would come back to the NFL? We need him
PDB: I would rather watch Q's 7th grade team
Deep pass to Rice, who makes a very nice catch
Q: Sidney Rice might be the man
PDB: He's solid
Fuzz: Holcomb is bad, but he's better then T Jack. Jackson can't even make a read
Q: imagine how good he'd be with a real NFL QB
Yet another long run by Peterson
Fuzz: Run AP!!!!!!!!!!
PDB: I love how everybody picks up Roddy White this week and now Mike Jenkins is going off
Q: End of the first, GB 7, Minny 0 (shocking)
Fuzz: Weird first quarter. Minnesota's offense hasn't looked that bad. Our D looked suspect for a series. I can't figure us out
Q: 7-0 Marlins in the first. Glavine yanked after 2/3 inning. No playoffs for the Mets
PDB: That's a big time choke job and how pissed is Reyes/Wright going to be?
Q: If they don't get Santana those guys might leave
PDB: Weird, INT Ed Reed
And yet another deep pass that falls incomplete
Q: We've gone deep like 6 times already. What's going on?
Fuzz: It's our kick a** offense
Q: Yeah, Chilly is looking like a flipping genius so far
Fuzz: C-pep to Porter, 6
Q: I hate Jerry Porter
PDB: Q, of course when we bench him
Q: Those Coors Light coaches commercials are the best. They never get old
PDB: Ron Dayne is good…
Fuzz: …at eating Big Macs and donuts
Fuzz: Woods two down, biggest choker ever
Vikings stuff a Packer running attempt on 3rd down and short
Q: 3rd and 1...big stop by the Purple D
Fuzz: We are the best run D ever, sorry to question you Q, I won't let that happen again
PDB: Great call, I just changed it off the game for golf until the 3:00 game starts
Q: Let's go now. Quit going deep when our QB can't make the throw and our WR's can't make the catch
Q: All of my players on my three fantasy teams have about 100 yards combined right now. Brutal
Q: JC Pearson (aka Tiger Woods) and Ron Pitts as the announcers. Do you think they get tired of watching our awful team every week?
Fuzz: Hmmm, yes
Fuzz: Tatum Bell fumbled in the red zone. How many opportunities has he blown in his career?
PDB: Way too many
PDB: Tiger just went OB on a par 5. He doesn't care about this tournament
Q: Why should he. He dominated all the majors this year, the rest is garbage
Fuzz: He wants to go home and hang out on his 100 million yacht
Q: How expensive does your boat have to be for it to be called a yacht?
Fuzz: In the millions
Q: Holcomb incomplete to...um, someone? That pass was to McKinnie
PDB: This is so bad
Fuzz: We punt more then anyone in the league
PDB: Q, great call on that Buffalo/Jets game being a shootout
Q: Shut up. Pennington still has more fantasy points than Bulger right now
Fuzz: Fantasy update: Berrian 2-10, Edwards 2-84 and a td. My team is loaded
Q: Deep completion by Favre. If that was Holcomb, he would have been sacked for sure
Fuzz: It's so big to have a good QB. We're like the same team on the other 21 spots, except for the most important one.
Q: Sketchy fumble call by the ref there. Biased trying to help Favre for sure
Favre completes a pass to Donald Lee at the MIN 5 where he is stripped and the ball pops out, recovered by the Vikings
Q: Big rip by Dwight "Stairwell" Smith right there
Fuzz: What was that? That ball went so high, it was like game of 500
PDB: Lamont is a machine
Q: What a great sleeper he's become this year
PDB: Big time
PDB: Mike Jenkins again; Harrington is good for fantasy
Q: Can we get some scoring in any of these games?
Fuzz: Ced Benson has 3 rushing yards. He's so overrated
Q: So are the Bears
PDB: C-Pepp TD
Q: to...?
PDB: Rushing
PDB: Julius Jones gets a short TD all of the sudden
Q: What? Where is Barber?
Q: Coaches I hate: Bellichick, Shannahan, and now...Jason Garret (or whoever is responsible for giving JJ a goal line carry over MB3)
AP for roughly 15 yards…again
Fuzz: Dogg it's time to get AP’s jersey
Q: AD=All Day...learn about it GB
PDB: Mike Weir is absolutely dominating Tiger
AP on a huge 40 yard run, juking GB defenders in the process
Q
: Al Harris, please report to the 35 yard line to pick up your jock strap. Al Harris to the 35 please
Fuzz: Can we run every down with AP? We might be better
Terrible incompletion by Holcomb…again
Q: Once again, who was that to?
Q: Would we be better with the Sex Cannon as our QB?
Fuzz: Yes, we be better off with you
Q: Yeah, but I have a gun
Fuzz: You're 5'7
Q: and a half
Fuzz: I forgot about the half, yes, you're for sure better now
PDB: Can't watch it--so bad
Field Goal Vikings. 7-3 GB
Q
: Big FG by Longwell there...he looks hungry
Q: and yes, that's a shot at you Fuzz
PDB: TD Jamal
Fuzz: Anderson?
Q: J Lewy is quietly putting together a good season
PDB: Browns are rolling Baltimore
Q: Baltimore is the most overrated team outside of Chicago
PDB: Ced Benson got pulled for Garrett Wolfe
Q: No Way. Wolfe? The all time leading D2 (or 1AA) rusher?
PDB: Yes, him
PDB: TD Moose Muhammad
Fuzz: Griese is comin, comin
PDB: TD Ronnie Brown
Q: Favre has all day to throw
PDB: Jets/Buffalo 0-0 at half
Q: Yeah but Chad has 125 in the air
Q: Favre just set another record--most pass attempts in history
Q: Vikes go up top again...and actually complete!
PDB: Yippee
Fuzz: Free agent QB's next year: Bulger, Romo, Boller, McCown, and yes the Sex Pistol!!
Q: Romo will be locked up before the end of the year, probably Bulger too. Let's get Boller
PDB: I want to get the sex pistol
Q: How cool would it be if we get the Cannon and he turns his career around in a Screw You move to the Bears?
Q: Again, who the hell is Holcomb throwing to?
PDB: Why does Baltimore run Musa Smith?
Q: Because Brian Billick is an offensive guru
Fuzz: McKinnie is awful!!
PDB: TD human joystick on a punt return
Q: Where is he playing this year?
PDB: STL
Fuzz: A sleeper for a QB free agent I didn't list is Jim Sorgi. Maybe he's awesome but no one knows because of Peyton
Q: I heard he's really good at taking a knee when you're up by 30
PDB: That was the dumbest comment I’ve ever heard Fuzz
Field Goal MIN. 7-6 GB
Q: Another FG by Longwell. He came to play today
PDB: Longwell is hungry today
Fuzz: " Harrington is good for fantasy" I think this takes the cake over mine...
PDB: Looks at his numbers, stats don't lie
Fuzz: The 19th best QB in the league in our college league. Great call
Q: Everytime we blitz, Favre completes a crossing route or a slant for 8 yards
Five consecutive completions by Favre as Green Bay is driving at the end of the half
Fuzz: Is the Gophers D on the field right now?
Q: Favre will for sure lead the Pack to a field goal
PDB: I love fantasy and hate the Vikings
Fuzz: Robison has been a nice surprise
Q: Him and Edwards are playing ok
Field Goal GB. 10-6 Packers
Fuzz
: Mason Crosby? Isn't he a hockey player?
Q: in the off season
PDB: That's Bobby Crosby
Q: that's baseball
PDB: Oh, Sidney Crosby then
Q: Pretty sure Fuzz knew that. It's called a joke, learn about it
PDB: Romo MVP
Fuzz: Is John David Booty a junior or senior? He'd look good in purple
Q: Why is he John David instead of just John, or Johnny, or JD?
Q: 10-6 Pack at the break in a borderline unwatchable game. At least we can watch Chuck Foreman get inducted into the Vikes HOF...oh wait, we're going to commercial, nevermind
PDB: I want Colt Brennan
Fuzz: Colt threw 5 picks vs eden prairie yesterday
Q: I'll take Booty, Brennan, Brohm, anyone over the garbage we have
Fuzz: LSU just jumped USC in AP poll. Wow.
PDB: Eden Prairie is good
Q: That's why the polls in college football are stupid. They tell you not to run it up on teams, but if you win a close game, you lose ground in the polls to a team that crushed somebody.
Q: Get a playoff already NCAA
PDB: Lynch 10 yard TD!!!
Second half gets underway…
Fuzz
: And were back. If we ever needed a good second half, this is it. We have to win this game to keep our playoff hopes alive and fans interested
Q: Can we please get to Favre before he throws another crossing route for 8 yards?
Fake punt by GB that goes for a first down despite no fewer than 6 Vikings having a shot to tackle the punter on the play
Q: Our D just got juked by a freaking punter
Fuzz: That is just stupid
Q: Dwight Smith is having a day. He just lit up Jennings on a cross
Fuzz: Have we ever found out why Favre unsnaps his chin strap every time?
Q: Because of that perma 5 o'clock shadow
Another field goal for the Packers
Q
: 13-6 Pack. How are we still in this game?
Fuzz: I have no idea, it doesn't look good though.
Q: AD on kick return? I don't like that
Fuzz: What is Sean Connery doing on TV
Q: He's got Favre's record breaker ball
Q: That begs the question: what do they do about getting Favre's final TD pass that sets the mark? Do you hold on to every TD ball for the rest of his career?
Q: Or is it only the record breaking ball that matters to the HOF?
Q: Huge run by Chester. If we get a TD here...
Fuzz: Another huge run for the Vikes. We are we even passing? Let's run every down for the rest of the year
Fuzz: Mount McKinnie is more like a small mogul. He sucks. I'm sorry, get him out of here.
Q: You don't have to apologize, he's terrible
Field goal, Vikings
Q: 13-9. Not even a threat of us getting in the end zone either.
Vikings stuff the Pack but get pinned at their own 5 yard line on the punt
Fuzz
: Big stop for the Vikes at the end of the 3rd quarter. We need a TD to go ahead. This is getting embarrassing. I don't know if we'll score over 10 TD’s all year. Kick a** baby!
Q: If we run the ball, everything will be fine. 95 yard drive coming up right here.
Fuzz: Is that a call?
Q: Absolutely not. I wouldn't call us to drive 5 yards for a td
Fuzz: Wow, three and out. Can we just contract us right now and get a new team next year?
Q: We're one Favre pick away from winning this game...
Fuzz: Q, what do you think about the FOX NFL robot?
Q: It's the single dumbest thing a network has ever done. First of all, they don't exist, so what's the point? Second, do you really think that more people will watch your network because some cartoon robot is running in place? How about using that computer hard drive space to constantly show me up to the play stats (like CBS does) instead of a freaking Transformers rip off pretending to catch a football? I could go on all afternoon as to why this is flipping stupid...
Fuzz: You know what's not stupid? The Coors Light commercial with Denny Green. "They are who we thought they were..."
Q: We should wear these throwbacks jersey’s more often. Our new uni's blow. These are classic.
Fuzz: 5 punts, 3 field goals, no touchdowns. Readers, your Minnesota Vikings!
Fuzz: A catch then a big hit, then a fumble. Yet they call it an incomplete. Why? Let that go and then challenge it!
Q: That's not going to stop Chilly from trying to challenge it
Fuzz: Can we get Mike Tomlin back? How did we let him walk...
Q: The same way we let Dungy go, and Billick...who else am I forgetting.
Fuzz: Mike Tice
Q: Sorry, I forgot to clarify--good coaches.
Pass to Morency is ruled complete despite him clearly not getting even one foot inbounds
Fuzz: What a horrible call by the line judge. Is their a line judge in the NFL below the age of 83? I haven't seen one
Favre throws another one, this time on a fly route
Q: TD Favre and the Pack. GAME. OVER.
Vikings in the hurry up, and of course Holcomb gets sacked
Q
: Keep holding that ball Kelly. You suck
Fuzz: Can this please be over? Holcomb sacked again.
Fuzz: I'm not sure anymore if we're going to win more then 3 games. We can't score. Period. You might see a new head coach next year guys...
Q: Screw it, let's give Bollinger a look next week. If I have to watch one more game where Holcomb gets sacked 10 times I'm going to throw up
Fuzz: Should we do the old give Jeff George a call? He's been a week 5 pick-up for a team the last 5 years
Q: Fine with me. Call Cunningham too. I'm sure he's making countertops or something.
PDB: Will the Vikes win another game this year?
Fuzz: I don't know, I'm going to check the schedule.
Q: I got us at 4-12 this year. We'll beat either Detroit or Chicago or Washington at home
Fuzz: Home against Oakland or at the Giants are the only hopes
PDB: 4-12 is accurate I think
Q: We could win at SF, they're not good
Touchdown Minnesota. Holcomb to Rice. 23-16 Packers
Q: TD Sid Rice. He looks good today
PDB: Kelly Holcomb time
First play of the ensuing possession and the Packers fumble the ball. Recovered by Minnesota. Under 2 minutes remaining, no timeouts.
Fuzz: Hold up on that next win, it could be right now...fumble green bay
Q: Holy cow...
Fuzz: I'm going to be the pessimistic, do we ever win games like this?
Q: Al Harris is like a little kid--he gets beat on a play and then pretends to be hurt. What a punk Q: We never used to, until...
Fuzz: Until what? We still got Kelly Holcomb. He just threw a four yard duck
Q: Just wait for it a sec…
Interception Packers
Fuzz
: Told you! Pick Green Bay. Always!!
PDB: Of course the Pack
Q: That's what I get for being optimistic
PDB: Homer
PDB: Jeff Garcia is rolling again
Q: I'd given up on them too, but then they pull me back in with that fumble recovery--only to rip my heart out again
PDB: Trent Dilfer is in for SF
Fuzz: Why didn't we get Jeff Garcia? Unreal. UFA last year and we didn't even make a play for him
Q: Why would we try to get him? Chilly said we have the future in T Jack
PDB: Might be a playoff team with Garcia or Carr
Q: I'll say we'd be a lock for the playoffs with either one of those two. This is brutal
Fuzz: That's a wrap. Green Bay 23- Minnesota 16. AP looks like he's going punch chilly in the face.
Q: Not if I get there first

2 comments:

Chosman said...

First, how are we ever going to win at the Giants when they sacked Donovan 12 times!!? We could be in the 20's. Second, thoughts on Andre Woodson from Kentucky? He's for real. And lastly, how about those all gold Gopher uni's? Nothin is as sharp as those, especially with the incredible athlete that is Adam Weber getting a designed run for 2 yards on 3rd and 6. Minnesota football is garbage...when do the Vixen start playin at Midway?

Fuzz said...

Chosman~
WTF? Your comment was posted around 1:00am so I'm going to guess that this was "green" influenced.